Rough hewn aggregate of bad seeds,
From violent father, insouciant mother,
A conglomeration of disappointed
Ambitions, abandoning by lovers
That further chipped away and misshaped you
Pent up rages that sought retribution.
Born from your bad seed,
Transient fathers and violent mother
Too smart for my own good, apparently
Prejudged, No better than I aught to be
Kept your dirty secrets, hidden bruises
‘Neath incongruous charity shop clothing,
Capacious folds shrouding my raw scabs
Scars map your angers compassionless course
I manufactured my moral compass
Picked my stony path through your bleak landscape
Sought safe havens, locked doors barred your attacks
‘I’ll hate you when I’m grown up’, defiance
Shouted through door jams crack,
I’ll tell everyone, they’ll all know the truth
Complaisant, you knew I never would.
Mouth shut as the doors I cowered behind.
You swaggered to your bed, shared with my
Sister, the next warped generation, I
Waited, listened, fearing a ruse, shivered
Huddled against the radiator, heat
And hope, dying
Life went on, surviving, I escaped,
My sister left home, finally, you were
Alone
I carry you still, the burden I shoulder
The fibromyalgia caused by trauma
Ground teeth, aching gums from years clamping
My mouth
Shut
But this is my life, roughhewn aggregate
Worn smooth like my teeth, that open, release
This conglomeration of memories
That tell my truth, no retribution here
Just release from you, release from all fear
