Call me Dave by Stephanie Farnsworth

He’s dropped ‘call me Dave’!

With the idea the plebs he’ll save.

Hug a hoodie,

rather slaughter a husky.

Or grab one to join the foxes

while benefits docked.

It’s killing badgers that matter

and Saudi to flatter.

We’ll bomb the terrorists

they fund to take the piss.

 

Shoot the blighters!

I mean, the badgers!

And ISIS!

Stop The War?

What a bore.

Bullets, bombs get us money.

Stupid, it’s the economy!

 

But he’s got George Osborne:

hard choices he’ll not mourn.

Tough decisions must be made

like whether he gets champers or you get paid.

Give up heat; it’s for the nation!

Cutting the deficit: his fixation.

Thatcher, he has to thank her,

for recognising the horror for bankers

so hard they work

long hours to go berserk.

Let’s give them a tax break

it’s the scroungers on the take!

 

Then there’s Jeremy Hunt.

Guess his nickname- take a punt!

Trusted with the NHS

but look, it’s such a mess!

Let the funding stall

step back and watch it fall

so he can sell it to his mates

passing on the best rates.

If you were sick who would you trust?

A doctor kicking up a fuss?

No, he wants his friends

so any rule they can bend.

 

Look and admire Prime Minster Cameron!

How he soldiers on

after the news about the pig

like he gives a fig.

What a tough task it must be

taking from you and me.

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