Sanity screams inside my pillow
plump with mucus and squealing feathers
as I wait for those brave, armed men
to plunder my tiny corporeal vessel
and minutiae of cells.
Sometimes they slick on past my shivering,
sweat soaked, underdeveloped undulations,
to reach for intangibles hanging mid air
as if swatting flies, as if dragging the stars
down one by one while I lay contiguous
with prior scenes on replay
and as if he knows deep inside his inner child,
god does not want this, no god would want this
and not for me, his child.
He grabs and grasps while the vacant space,
devoid of humanity and conscience,
fills again with a cesspool of ideology –
it whirs and it chops down my womanhood,
and my freedom from unripe stems
that colour match the corrosion on the blunt blades
of fat, stagnant, stinking fingers and blood red
Squished trophies lie with me among detritus –
I lie still, like dead leaves, mottled with the burnt fragility
of a young girl untouched by summer,
and who will never to be escorted by autumn.
My young life lives in rivulets of blood
flowing away from me. I am debris pitched
with the cloying darkness,
whose half sister, shade wraps around me
like a clinging film of black death as if to silence
me and prepare me for moonlight’s sharp,
acid drops when he frantically bastes me in hell.
He says raping me
will draw him closer to god.
O, wicked god, are you watching?
Betrayed by the moon too, I see his shadow –
a reflection of his dark self
when it becomes ingrained in the warped
and rotten floorboards which creak
with back breaking disgust and which are stained
with his footprints of vermin slime.
When he leaves us, the dirty floor and I
lie in the dust, unpinned from his religious
mental contagion and physical oppression…
Anita Kulkarni Nabonne writes poetry, stories and verses for children and has had articles published for Conservation. She has appeared in several anthologies by Forward Press and Dogma. She has poems published in Winamop magazine, I am not a silent poet and a short story published by Fiction magazines. Three poems appear in Praxis magazine (Poets for Peace collaboration) and soon 2 poems will be included in an anthology to be released soon.
From the North East of the UK, she lives with her American husband. Her blog is https://writingasitcomes.wordpress.com/