Mafioso Pizza by Joe Balaz

Soon aftah I wen move
into da new neighborhood

I walked around wun corner to see
wun catchy sign above wun storefront window—

Mafioso Pizza.

 Next to da name of da joint

wuz wun depiction
of wun 1930s Chicago style gangster.

Da character wuz wearing
wun fedora and wun suit

and he wuz smiling
while he wuz holding wun tommy gun.

Da caption on da bottom of da sign
read “There’s no crime in killing your hunger.”

One of my friends did tell me

dat dis West Side area wuz moa rougher
den wheah I used to live.

At least da owner of da pizzeria
had wun sense of humor.

Den again
it’s not as crazy as da East Side of town.

Cleveland’s police
and some suspect bad guys

recently took it
to wun new kine height ovah deah.

Law enforcement
responded to wun high speed car chase

by using wun bazooka to kill wun ant.

Five dozen cop cruisers
joined in on da intense pursuit

wen da runaway car’s backfiring muffler
wuz mistaken for gunshots.

Aftah da vehicle wuz stopped and cornered
13 officers unloaded 137 bullets into da car.

One highly amped cop

jumped up on da hood
and fired rounds point blank through da windshield.

It sounds exciting

but he wuz only putting extra holes
into two freshly snuffed out corpses.

Before he did dat

da unarmed couple in da front seat
wuz already dead from da preceding hail of gunfire.

Bottom line

it wuz just anadah day
in da big city wit big reactions

next to da big lake.

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